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I want to discuss women’s issues, but can’t without my words being manipulated by feminists into their cause. I want to discuss genuine problems concerning black and brown people in the UK and USA, but I’m bombarded with ‘black lives matter’ rhetoric. I want to discuss British politics and the Labour Party, but when I criticise identity politics, I am classed as ‘conservative.’
Pro-women or pro-feminist?
If I am watching a TV show and point out sexism towards women, it doesn’t automatically make me a feminist. If I comment on the sexualisation of female pop stars in the music industry, or male-centric language of a text, I ought to without being swooped up by a lobbyist group. I should be able to discuss genuine sexism against women without needing to align myself to feminism.
Sure, I may be using language and terms commonly used by feminists, and probably agree with feminists on some things. But my overall world view is not feminist, because I look at men and women through equal lenses. I do not assume that our society is inherently ‘misogynistic’ or that women are treated as second class citizens. (I actually believe the opposite to be true; women in Britain face huge social advantages over men.)
Feminism makes it difficult for women to discuss our opinions. If a woman makes any comment about sexism against women, despite specifying that she is NOT a feminist, feminists often insist ‘but you ARE a feminist!’
I recognise that there are genuine biological gender differences between men and women. Feminism typically chooses to ignore this, instead claiming gender as ‘socially constructed’. I recognise men’s rights as well as women’s rights, and misandry as well as misogyny.
(A self-described radical feminist once told me that misandry isn’t real. I’ll bet plenty of semi-radical feminists agree with her.)
Feminists claim to want gender equality, but belittle men, claiming that their masculinity is ‘fragile’ or ‘toxic.’ They have slogans like ‘the future is female’ and ‘girl power’ and want women to replace men in all high-powered business positions. That’s not equality, that’s matriarchy. (But they won’t tell you that.) They also claim to be in favour of ‘all women’, yet exclude housewives; stay-at-home mothers, sex workers, conservatives, pro-lifers, and any woman who is anti-feminism.
Lives Matter
Then there’s our dear movement Black Lives Matter. Of course I believe conceptually that black lives matter (no more than I believe that the lives of people of any ethnic demographic matter). Of course there are racial issues affecting black people (and people of other ethnic demographics) worldwide. But many who support Black Lives Matter don’t believe that racism exists against white people. They see black people as oppressed victims. They subscribe to a cause supported by black supremacists who view white people as ‘sub-human.’
(Note on the above: I understand the significance of Black Lives Matter as pertaining to African Americans and their issues with police brutality, and wrote as much here.)
Not only is it incredibly difficult to try and discuss social problems without aligning it to these lobbyist groups, it is depressing. It genuinely makes me miserable, especially when I see people who have similar views to me. I am not politically conservative. However, I have definitely gotten far more ‘shit’ about some of my views from people with similar political views to me. Because I choose to be pragmatic and open-minded, and point out genuine sexism and racism rather than classing everything that ‘offends’ me as sexist/racist, I feel like a social pariah among people I am ‘supposed’ to have similar social views too.
The difference between a radical and a non-radical: the radical is truthful about what they believe in. The non-radical hides their true thoughts from the world by appearing ‘tolerant’ and ‘respectful.’
Free Radicals
Sure, some may say that it is only the ‘radicals’ within the movement who speak like this. But I disagree; I think the movements themselves are radical, and they attract radical people who just want something to rally and fight against. They don’t want to intelligently discuss these issues, they want chaos.
In the words of our pal Littlefinger; chaos is a ladder, and angry dogmatic idealists can use chaos to climb the ranks and establish their insane world orders. That’s what theocracies and fascism have done throughout human history. We’re headed there if not careful. (Unless Artificial Intelligence murders us all first.)
#TheFutureIsFemaleArtificialIntelligence
One of the most beautiful thing about your writings are that they are controversial but true. You never shy away from voicing your opinion and always stand by what you believe. I completely agree with everything you said in this article. Especially Feminism!!! Oh god! Feminism is poison! I know, being a women myself, it might sound a bit absurd, but I don’t really agree with the concept of Feminism because these days, it is more about establishing women as the superior species rather than getting equality for them.
I loved how you threaded threaded this piece and have given all your readers a lot to think about. You are a strong women, Zarina and I am so proud of you and this blog post! 🙂
Thank you so much for your wonderful response, it almost made me tear up. I am just glad to provide a platform for opinions that deviate from mainstream media.
The feminist movement doesn’t really care about women, because it claims that gender is ‘socially constructed’ and refuses to celebrate and examine the very real genuine biological and hormonal differences between men and women. So it actually makes more sense for a woman to reject it (but because it has been marketed as ‘the women’s movement’, it tries to claim to be in favour of all women, rather than specifically feminist women).
There is a book I am currently reading called ‘The Female Brain’; I had a look at some of the reviews on Goodreads, and unsurprisingly, the feminists who read it didn’t like it because it asserts that men and women have hormonal and chemical differences. Ironically, it is a very pro-women and pro-feminine book, because it highlights some of the unique qualities that the female brain possesses (e.g. women’s skills in communication, empathy, and recognizing facial expressions and emotional cues). If feminism was really about celebrating being female and the feminine essence, then it would gladly champion such a book, but instead it belittles it.
It’s also really hard for women to outwardly reject feminism because there is so much pressure to conform to it, and most of us don’t really get educated on the feminist movement or its origins. On some of my older blog posts, I engaged in a lot of discussion with a woman who studied up on the feminist movement and women’s history. I didn’t initially agree with all of what she said, but I was very willing to hear her perspective, and I actually did my own research (including reading ‘The Flipside of Feminism’ by Suzanne Venker and Phyllis Schlafly, which is a great book for truly understanding the feminist movement). Now I am super thankful for her helping to educate me on feminism without being condescending or ‘overly offended’ at me having different opinions.