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From time to time I find myself wondering; why do I care so much about feminism? Why do I give a shit about libertarian vs authoritarian politics? Who cares if people use the word slut? Why am I so anti-religion? What does it matter what I think? Why must I have an opinion on everything? I could just blog about music and films and books. It wouldn’t get as many views as my other stuff, but it would be there.
So why do I care? At the base of all this, I’m a thinker. I’m an intellectually curious person; always have been. I question everything and analyse. That’s the way my mind works. I’m handed a piece of information; I ask ‘why’ or ‘how.’ If I really can’t understand it (like understand Physics or Chemical Engineering) I put it aside. If I can, I read further into it.
When I find a piece of information, I look into whether or not I disagree, and evaluate why. What is the consensual view, the ‘socially accepted’ view? Then I look further into that. If I disagree, I begin to wonder why and use reason and logic to deduct why so many people won’t look past this thing.
This could be applied to anything. Feminism. Looking at why it’s necessary. Looking at why it’s not. Examining the impact it has on the world. Why many who have a strong opinion on it don’t really research or look into it. One girl I once conversed with online said ‘I don’t need to read any feminist literature, I know it’s all about equality.’
My mind is analytical and sharp. It’s also rather lonely. I realise that many don’t think like I think. Many do just go along with the ‘herd mentality’ and collectively accepted norms. Trump is an arsehole; feminism is necessary, black people are losers. I think you can hold whatever opinion you want, as long as you can back it up. Making strawman arguments or resorting to name-calling is not going to help anyone.
Intellectuals are often made fun of or seen as ‘stuck up’ by others. The smart nerdy kid in school is often portrayed in the media as a know-it-all that likes to lord it over others. Hermione Granger, Lisa Simpson, Daria Morgendorffer; girls I all identify with. And maybe it’s true. Maybe we are just snobbish, stuck up and arrogant because we know we’re intellectually superior to everyone else. We pride ourselves on our brains and dust off our shoulders.
But perhaps underneath is sadness. Sadness that we’re alone with our brains. Sadness that we’ll forever be seen as ‘weird’ or ‘too much’ by others. Sadness that when we bring to the table the fact that the earth is round or we all evolved from apes, people laugh. People laugh and they call us blasphemous, weird, silly, or downright wrong.
This is probably my depression talking, but there are so many times when I think to myself ‘what is the point of life?’ Go to uni, watch a movie, go to AA, masturbate. All of these are just a bunch of distractions till you die.
Why bother? So what if people view things a certain way? So what if I disagree with them?It’s not really because of the topics. It’s because of the underlining need to critically examine, rationalise and look at information. Weigh up pros and cons. Because it scares me that many don’t do this. It scares me that many just take something and pass over it. It scares me that people will blindly go ‘Trump is a racist’ without actually listening to a speech he has given.
My belief is that really, people just don’t care. I don’t have Orwell’s optimism. I don’t think there’s ‘hope in the proles’. The proles are there to just go along with life; eat, sleep, mate, go to work. The bourgeois are there to exploit the ignorance and apathy of the proles. Times are changing because of the internet, and we’re being brought close and closer together in an ever globalising/technologically advanced world. I’m no revolutionary, but there’s a reason the intelligencia class are the ones that generate change. There’s a reason the ones that advance or change society are in the middle, rather than the proles or the bureaucrats/business owners/monarchs.
So if you are like me, I encourage you to continue to think. An unexamined life is not worth living. Think even if you turn into Rick Sanchez and realise life has no inherent meaning, we’re all just a bunch of atoms bouncing off on another in an ever expanding universe. Think but don’t over-think. Don’t become a neurotic like me. Think so that it enriches your mind and helps you to understand others and the world around you. Think to help others to think. Think and realise that there is more to your existence then eating, sleeping, fucking and shitting. Think and open your mind. Think and be free.
